This ended up being my farewell message to the cast and crew of the Red Dirt production of the Laramie Project.
I’m mostly all packed, and completely exhausted. Gonna take a nap before I decide when to leave. Whatever the decision, I’ll be gone soon. It’s been intense and I miss you already.
This is quite a high to come down from, I guess you guys know how to do it. I certainly don’t.
I feel like a naive kid that was pressured into shooting up, developed a taste for it, and then the pusher vanished.
I’m curled up shaking in the corner trying not to vomit every time my body clenches and spasms and shakes. Stinging sweat pouring into my eyes, mixing with tears and snot and need.
I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive y’all. Putting me through this. Making me care. Making me feel pain and anger and joy.